oh my god I didn't know your sister was this good at french kissing
Scared. last time someone tried to talk me into they said it tastes like tapioca and i projectiled onto a closed window
I would dunk an oreo in her breast milk
woke up rolled in a yoga mat listening to enya. I'm never going back to Oregon ever again.
Breaking personal boundaries is my trademark
He left with a pair of dress shoes, some goggles, and a shot glass. I think we should follow him.
Is waterboarding an exceptable way of getting sober?
i gave her a can of corn and told her the cabs are accepting non perishable food items over the holidays. blatant lie and she lives like $40 away
just printed out my drug dealers resume for him. guess the ecstasy scene slows down when kids move back home for the summer...
my longitudinal study of the long term effects of sloth and alchol-intake is nearly complete.
so you are graduating this semester.
"He was so not worth staining my backseat for."
The bartender has no bra and is giving out free shots. Call mom I'm getting married.
He must've been a bear in a previous life. My nipple is bleeding. Shit's sensitive.
My brother is coming home and he is bringing a whole bunch of friends with him. I am making him a cake. What should i put on it?
"Open for business" or "I have condoms" would probably work
this poor kid thinks hes going to have his first time with both of us
Randomize
