I just spent $27 on things to pee on.
so basically i'm the" little sister", he's the "big brother" and we just fucked
Just saw a white stretch Hummer limo outside of CiCi's pizza. Way to live up to the stereotypes, Alabama.
Just met someone from Jersey. No fist pumps or jagerbombs. Kind of disappointed...
Is all white too much for court to prove my innocents?
ALTON JUST DID GRAVY SHOTS. THIS IS WHY HE'S MY HERO
She may be a slut, but at least she's a dedicated slut. She's always super tan and has her shit shaved in really cool designs.
For looking exactly like her, she tasted less like her sister than I would've thought
Update: it wasn't just our driver. This ticket confirms that the Royal Oak PD also found our behavior on the party bus to be "Lewd and Indecent."
Dude when we asked him where he lived all he could tell us was "by the slurpees." That fucked up.
But mostly the blowjob in the airport bathroom was what I was laughing at.
still not dressed at 5:00, jacking off watching men's figure skating and hoping my weird roommate doesn't walk in. anybody who says idk how to have fun is wrong
I made out with a girl because I wanted to get in the VIP section of the bar because they have these big comfy couches. It worked.
And to be clear I have only watched porn like 3 times at work
Jack said he hasn't jerked off in like two weeks and he's like a smoldering volcano who wants to bury you like Pompeii with his man gravy
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