Apparently every Tri-Delt knows what I did and I am blacklisted from ever dating anyone in that house.
Well ya you lied, told her you cared, took her virginity and then broke up with her at Christies Toy Box.
I honestly thought the dildo was a nice parting gift.
I have said "that's the wrong hole" for the last time.
A female Wisconsin fan just headbutted the bouncer. Im deeply terrified and oddly aroused at the same time.
Now there's vomit covered trash all over the front lawn. I feel accomplished
If I start taking birth control 8 days after we had sex do you think it'll stop the baby from being made?
I was greeting people at my door feeding them jello shots out of an ice cube tray with a spoon.
I'm stoned entirely off resin. Licking my blankets. Merry Christmas. Jesus died for our sins. Yay Jesus. I love you.
She tried to leave the threesome and I heard you yell "Hey! We don't quit at halftime!"
her mom went out of her way to book us a room with separate beds... her level of gay denial is in beast mode
My dick pics could make it to the popular page on Instagram.
Holy shit I've found my last one night stand in my Gran's knitting club
Tackling and headbutting friends, running away and hiding from everyone, attempting to streak across campus, and then waking up with no sign of a hangover... happy 21 to me
Found sauce from last night's pizza rolls wedged under my phone case... While sitting in my 8 am class. What happened last night?
The Olympian is in my bed
I think it's a bit on the nose for the Uber driver to play stairway to heaven while driving like A psycho.
Randomize
