WHY DIDN'T ANYON E TELL ME SHE WAS SIXTEEN
we made a giant pot of alcholic jello. i filled a gallon bag and brought it to dorms. desk guy gave me weird looks, he doesnt realize this is how i will pass all of my room searches
wicked high...have munchies. cherry flavor lube. problem solved.
We should see who can shotgun a beer faster over iPhone FaceTime
my momz letting me make the christmas card in photoshop
so that means christmas in space?
imma make our dead cats ghosts like obi wan kenobi
Just so you know you don't have to worry about me picking up any guys tonight. The Hilton is hosting guests from the North American Gay Volleyball Association and the Comic Palooza
Operation liquormelon is in full effect. We may die tonight.
If I were there, I'd be putting a martini in you, via funnel if need be, and you would be doing this thing.
We saluted the chips to the national anthem before cooking them. The house has to get a munchies fryer
And I can say one thing, I look pretty good in high wasted pants. I don't know if that helps. But I do. God I'm high.
It's like a booty call, except its for tacos...and you're my brother.
I just encountered the same creepy guy I showed you, he jumped inside the dumpster screaming.
I'm ready to sell my soul to the strip club tonight
I'm straight up riding in the back of my truck in a bean bag chair right now. Feet propped up and four loko in hand. Glorious.
Lmao a dude who just got out of prison said im worth 10 cigarettes in prison...I think that's a compliment
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