We left around 4 AM after the stripper showed no mercy and dropped into a split on Matt's nose. Massive nosebleed.
Yes..we had amazing sex that I have a 50 percent chance of remembering.
You broke the end off a wine bottle, ran outside and screamed "FOR NARNIA!!"
Know your penis has been the topic of conversation over glasses of wine.
If she "comes out" to me I guess I'll high five her. That's pretty much my response to everything these days.
Well.. If you trust a test that only costs a dollar, I'm not pregnant
Life achievement unlocked: I just ate a Slim Jim "Lady and the Tramp" style with a guy in a bar.
That was when I yelled "Wisconsin powers activate!" and took off sprinting across the ice
Also, for real, though? Did we even have sex or were we just jumping on the bed drunk and naked...because with me that's actually a possibility.
MY HAND WILL BE UP HIS ASS IF HE DOES NOT APOLOGIZE FOR WHAT HE DID. IT WON'T BE THE GOOD-FEELING KIND OF "HAND-UP-ASS" EITHER.
Well that didn’t go as expected.
I mean, it ended in you giving each of them a blowjob, so it kinda did.
Dude. If you guys end up really liking each other, the color of his pubes won't matter. I wouldn't break a sweat.
You're swimming in an imaginary pool of pudding. What do you think?
wow. that really looks like a penis. not a top hat
Fucker was flying a Bruins flag. He can pick up the dog's poop himself.
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