I don't think cute and don't forget to get tested belong in the same text
dude i dnt kno how, but i think theres a tampon in my butt
Finally jerked of with a banana peel.
I don't think its a good idea if I moon a whole bar again
I just gave some chick my debit card to put in the jukebox. She better put out.
i dont feel like going...you don't know how much work goes into getting my whore on
I really want to lead this Amish guy into temptation
He said, "cum on daddy's dick!" ... I pictured my dad. That just scarred me for life.
if masturbating while stoned isn't called "weed whacking" then i just don't know how to live my life anymore
hell no. i was not wasting my two tears of virginity on him.
I just started talking about how noodles were so good
Nothing says hey I wanna be your friend again like ambushing me with a dick pic
This town is a penis wasteland. I haven't seen a suitable penis in months. This is becoming an emergency situation. I need penis in my life
It's like I'm tryna ride my horse through dennis quaid’s vineyard
That's a sexy sentence
I made him fuck me while wearing a Thor helmat from Walmart. Geek sex is the best sex
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