its like he missed a chap in the "being a guy" handbook and read the bible instead
Can I use cash for clunkers to trade in her boobs for a new set of 18 year old tits?
Its worth a shot.
Ok Hollywood, I get it. Megan Fox is hot. Now she is in a movie where she is so hot that dudes just fucking die. Great.
You should have seen the look on the cashiers face when I was buying steel reserve with a suit on.
People were stuck in the elevator screaming and freaking out. I banged on the door and yelled, "fire depart!" They got excited and then I ran away. lolz
I should be nowhere even remotely near facebook in this condition.
I wrote and sealed my mom's mothers day card last night while intoxicated.. should i put it in the maibox
without a question
I left myself a trail of jello shots, that ended at his door. OR maybe he left me a trail of jello shots at his door. DO I GO IN!?
I can honestly say I've never had orange soda poured on my vagina before, that's a story for the grand kids
Where is a good place to buy a New Year's outfit that acknowledges I don't have tits but screams I suck dick like a champ?
This mustache is awesome. I can't pass by a mirror without looking in it and thinking damn, I'd like to give that guy a handy.
You give an incredible blow job. I wanted to make sure you know it was appreciated
He screamed like a woman when he came then proceeded to sing "you [we] are the champion" by Queen. I think I'm in love.
Holy fuck, my entire boob is bruised! Lierally my boob is just one big bruise.
dude, where did you go? french fries taste like numbers
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