are you still at the devil's house?
Do u think she knows her nickname is the oompa loompa
One thing i hate about playoff baseball: George Lopez
I just accidentally stumbled into an AA meeting...I think its a sign
I'm thinking I had intended to send you pics cuz I woke up naked
Why does it always end up with me crying in my car.
Im chasing shots of tequila with chocolate milk right now. by myself. its nasty, but I've had worse in tjere the past couple days, so ill take it.
You know, I've never slept in a rug with anyone before you
I rode home in a shopping cart so there's that. MVP to the guy that pushed it.
I told my coworker that I'd get him some edibles because he wants to rekindle his marriage. I'd better get some good karma out of this.
I found my bra I wore on Friday night...he fucked the underwire out of it
hahahahaha
I’M PUT OFF FROM FOOD RN BC EARLIER I GOT SOME WATER AND I WAS 4 SIPS IN WHEN I NOticed A FUCKING BURGER KING F R Y IN MY D R I N K
There were a lot of gay moments in between the Strippers and coke
He ate me out while I was wearing a canada goose parka and a dress hand crafted by a seamstress from yellowknife. I came while watching the northern lights. Most arctic orgasm ever.
Granted, I did not plan to spend ANY hour of the last day of 2020 sober.
Randomize
