I'm seeing double. Its like being in a room full of people
His dick might not be the answer to my problems, but I'm definitely ok with testing it as a possible solution.
thought the power was flickering out but it turns out im just blinking
So. Do you think marshmallow vodka in hot chocolate while eating a graham cracker would = s'mores?
In some strange universe, yes
I need to have some sort of hot sex experience in a mask.
You told me to remind you that the bruise on your ass is from when you danced on the table at Ziggy's, saw a cop and tried to 'fly away'.
Jesus, you make out with one twin then sleep with the other and suddenly they don't want to play soccer with you... So sensitive...
Then, he ate me out while I watched Bo Burnham. Best. Night. Ever.
And now let us go forth, and be garbage people in public.
Isn't that our default mode?
I'm drinking apple juice and champagne while watching crossroads..like the classy bitch that i am.
I woke up with sticky red stuff all over my sheets, face, and chest. Apparently after I blacked out I thought eating ribs in bed was a good idea
Can we start referring to attractive men as "A fine piece of dick?"
You kept on yelling traitor and threatened to kill him and everyone he loves because he played beerpong with someone else
I just caught your son trying to perform fellatio on himself. What do I do?
Why can't he see that I don't want a slow getting to know you period? I just want to bone. NOW.
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