I boned her and wore a Freddy mask once. It was pretty lol
HAH. HARRY POTTER CASUAL CONVO HAS BEEN EXTENDED TO DISCUSSING WEATHER. SO PRO
He was on Keeping Up with the Kardashians it was like a deed from god to bang him
Were playing beruit winners pelt losers with eggs
When I take mushrooms I can feel your presence down there. I can feel where Africa is too.
When you get home there will be live fish in the bathtub. I did not put live fish in the bathtub.
He's a Shit stain on my heart
You told the cop FUCK YOU AND YOUR TASER, i dont think he appricaited that
So, I'm drinking, and I put my head down in the table. The cat jumped up to check on me, I have a cat sober monitor.
I'm still pretty stoned. There are mini rice cakes in my robe pocket to snack on in the shower.
It's like that thing with the devil and the angel except one shoulder has orgasms and the other has stuffed crust pizza and depression.
Shhhh less advice, more soothing words and dirty phrases
My heart wants him and my vagina wants him...to have a bigger dick.
I just told my mormon professor that I was late because I was getting a STD test... good start to the day.
Woke up with a throbbing vagina and a lesbian in my bed. Then for the hell of it we had morning sex. Definitley bisexual now
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