do people in england often walk their sheep on leashes? or is this guy the exception to the rule?
I just watched nsync videos for the past half hour and you could totally tell lance bass was gay in all of them
pretty sure I offered to blow her dad. she's not speaking to me & he won't stop winking at me.
Being at this bar with grandma is a real cockblocker
I want her autograph on my taint
Im drinking in homer but I guess Egan got arrestest on an "assault by water ballon" charge but tom actually threw the water balloon in question at the bartender.
I woke up in the closet and then I found my shirt in a bag of Doritos... how does that work out?
I'm that hungover student in class ... On a wednesday morning
Omg I think I'm in the wrong class
In other news I have discovered that grindr is the easiest way to get free meals
I have to shower first, I forgot I peed on my feet last night...
Right now Tom has the 2nd floor office bathroom under siege. He shit/clogged one toilet, and he's throwing up in the sink.
Nothing brings compassion from a group of cafe workers like walking in and asking if they have a 'hangover special'
Buffalo PD walked in my bedroom this morning at 7 am. Was still blackout drunk, fully dressed, Steak Out wrapper on the floor, parking meter on the floor of the bar room. 'Both of your doors were wide open, wanted to make sure no one was robbing you.' Then I made a pass at her.
Can we just get drunk and watch the Birdcage please I have no tolerance for straight men today
Forget work, lets run away, rob banks, and have kinky sex with fuzzy handcuffs.
IT'S LIKE YOU READ MY MIND.
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