Ana's brother is visiting for the wknd. He came back to our place last night drunk to find me passed out naked it in the shower with the water still running. I was still drunk. We decided it was a good idea to have sex and sleep on the bathroom floor. Woke up this morning spooning and using my towel as a pillow.
Dude she pregamed for her sorority's philanthropy.
But hes like a baby bird with a broken wing that i want to FUCK.
We poured some Korbel out for our homie Dick Clark.
Slutty summer 2013 has officially started. I did accidentally bite a dick though.
Just finished off half a bottle of vodka. Can't take in anymore liquids so I ate 3 spoonfuls of your powdered gatorade to fight off the hangover. Wish me luck and check me for a pulse when you get in!
This stupid maranara sauce stain sucks. It keeps distracting me and it looks like I'm staring at my tits.
Woke up with a 22 year old with the number for a different girl written on my stomach, almost 30 can suck my dick I still got this shit
I need to wash the frat house off of me
you called me drunk last night to talk about summoning sex demons with magic WTF
Im legit just salty with everyone who has a penis right now
Is it bad if I look at someone i dont know and just want to punch them in the face?
I hope every time you eat hashbrowns you think about me, the awesome sex we had and how great we could have been.
I duct taped a bottle of vodka to the back of your closet while you were sleeping in case of emergencies. Go rip it off, it's going to be a long night.
OMG. When you threw the used condom on your floor you threw it in my purse!!! I just went to grab my headphones and it was stuck to them!
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