Is it too weird if im a sexy tampon for halloween?
well this feels familiar. awake at the crack of dawn laying in the fetal position praying for the sweet release of death. i think im done with jager for a while
I was unaware that a tutu and pasties was appropriate attire to this
I remember seeing LSAT prep books and thinking "Whose room is this? I should be hooking up with them instead."
I feel like tequila heightens the sense of my nipples.
I dont care about anyone or anything else I just want to make love to you on my air mattress
You SHOULD feel empty, we were at the top of our game, and by that i mean snorting things we don't understand and only a few steps away from adultery.
I would have to gauge my vagina to make it fit.
I am assuming I was his dirty Mardi Gras mistake and I can live with that
I could study for finals and ace all my tests but wheres the fun in that? id rather black out and hope for the best
This conversation has now reached a level of awkward that even a passerby streaking hobo couldn't break.
He carried around a bottle of jäger the whole night and when everyone thought the cops came, he started doing push ups in the middle of the floor cause he said it calmed him down.
She gave me a roadie as we drove home from fireworks. People were still lighting off their displays as we drove by. I love America.
He made a deal with his real estate agent called fucking in 50 properties for sale
this bedazzled flask is my best investment yet
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