Courtney? Is that you? I have pictures of this very same night.
Omg just saw this kid I went to elementary school with at the bar and he used to be cool and I was so awkward but now I have boobs so I WIN.
Just woke up on a couch in the FIJI house with 2 missed calls from someone I saved in my phone as "Some DU Kid Named TJ Maybe"
you make me proud to be your friend
She was crying and singing Taylor Swift on repeat. I'm never drinking with her again.
i only understood the part that said mucho orgasmos
There's an Captain Planet marathon because of Earth Day. I can't NOT turn this into a drinking game.
I wish a night of watching Dear John and a bottle of wine could cure my herpes.
a search helicopter?!
Just the amount of girls he locked himself in my room woth says your gonna have to take a cab bro. I don't think he's going anywhere
Let's be honest. I make up for my well below average sized penis with a great personality and a possibly successful future
2 men making out for 2 seconds to trick a cop so they don't get arrested for being pulled over rolling a blunt is not gay.
I feel as though I look like a mom with a substance abuse problem
So apparently I twerked on my coworkers last night. One month at the new job n I guess this is how I'm getting to know people
There was one thing about my NYC trip I forgot to tell you: I took a dump in Trump Tower
I’m tired of his bullshit and premature ejaculation. I’m going to hotel bars and finding a guy who is DTF
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