Can we switch to phone sex? This is starting to get awkward...
So in our children's lit class, some jackass little boy had gone thru the where's waldo book and circled waldo. I realize you would have been that kid.
You talked to that cop for like 15 minutes and when you got back, you told us you were "networking".
...She then said get into the spirit and started making firecracker noises while having sex
First night in the new apartment. There are 12 people here i don't know, Tequila, and a crying girl locked in our bathroom. I think the apartment christening is complete.
Did you get your crutches off the street sign?
I just came so hard there were tears. Actual tears.
Did you fuck him in my garden last night?
That WOULD explain the dirt in my vagina
Then she said I give the best mouth hugs and bar went silent.
That's what my new years consisted of. Consoling heartbroken girls and having people throw up in my hands.
Just pee around me
Currently at a fetish club with a set of swings (don't ask). Having flashbacks to the park by my house
I was about to google "rabies and sexual activity." Then I realized I was at work.
I'm really excited to meet your new dude! But we really need to find out if he's your cousin first.
How you run into a glAss door three times in a row I do not know
Randomize
