so howd the 'mom i only play with condoms' conversation go?
my boss just made his own remix to aaron carter's i want candy. i cant decide if its the funniest or most embarrassing thing ive seen
it felt like I walked into a Tool Academy challenge
Ya know, I lied. I wouldn't mess with him. Not because of the crazy/rehab issues... but because he wears tank-tops.
I am moving slowly w him. I havent even masturbated to him yet.
There's somethin not right about having to take the batteries out of your 27 year old boyfriends gameboy to use in your vibrator
Tequila me may have very bluntly told him that I wanted to touch his abs.
I dont care how high you are "yes" is not the correct response to "what do you want from Taco Bell" Mom.
If you asked me 10 years ago where I thought I'd be today, I can pretty much guarantee I wouldn't have replied with "buying hemorrhoid cream on Bourbon St at 7am"
I just watched this dude try to convince this girl to go home with him. She was like, That's cute, you're cute.and she just walked away. Man I'm so not drunk enough to be around this level of sad.
Well the term Party is used loosely in this situation. Since it will just be mom wine drunk and us eating chips with multiple dips.
How are you supposed to wish the guy you send nudes to good luck for the first day of his new job??
The sex definitely would have been a perk. But not sitting in a ditch was what I was going for...
Note to self, the correct response when a guy tells you he likes you as a person is not "ew"
Think i may just have managed the saddest high-five in history. Finished a sudoku and high-fived myself, then looked around for somebody to high five. there was noone. forever alone.
Randomize
