She has HUUUUUUUGE nipples
Listen, what he fails to understand is that the Olive Garden does not equal pussy.
I bruised his dick. I bruised his dick WITH MY MOUTH!! I've never felt more accomplished.
He showed up to fuck me at the same time the pizza guy did. It was like everything I needed just showed up at my stoop.
everyone contributed. i held her hair back, he rubbed my vag... it was a team effort.
I would just like you to know that the guy I blew off last weekend to come find ur drunk ass just got drafted into the major leagues.
Moment of silence for the loss of that option.
It was only 12:11 and I needed to make a Pepto Latte and call it a night, I don't remember that being part of my new years resolution.
Me. blonde. Sex. Dance floor.
if creating a fake 8 year old brother, who lives with me and has had mono for the past month, to explain why I have ignored my group project members is wrong, then I... well then I'm probably going to hell
Sometimes I feel like I should become a beautician purely for my ability to shave pretty shapes into my pubic hair.
You can see my drunken state get worse with each picture
day drinking caused me to be in bed at a decent time. can't complain.
This was the fourth year in a row I got arrested at Pride. Pretty sure that qualifies me as a legend.
He flipped me around so that we could have sex and both watch Die Hard... I think I found my sole mate. Merry Christmas to me!!🎄
I just puked on a sprinkler…Motherfucker tried to spray me
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