this is like her 8th guy since december, is she wasn't frumpy people would call her a whore
Call me in 2 minutes and go along with what I say. You're hysterical and I must go comfort you asap. He just asked if I was ready to experience sex with a wizard and he wasnt kidding.
its amazing how hard it is to tell vomit from stuffing the day after
and i'm pretty sure he drank the lava lamp
Thats why you have fulfilling relationships with nice girls and i have kinky sex with crazies
Just rented the SCUBA equipment. Meet me at the pool to test the underwater beer bong idea.
I just found pizaa roll in my hair. Already been to class today
Sorry I never showed up last night. It was between spending time with you and our freinds or having violent multiple orgasims. I chose the low road.
Im having a christmas reunion party tonight. Last year i ate my own contact. We'll see how this year goes
I'm so incredibly high right now the fact I am texting is nothing short of miraculous. Call the Pope. Hell make me Saint Roy, patron of stoners.
He has blue eyes of sex and i am powerless against them
Doesn't tell me where my computer chair went but good to know
I have to drop off my inflatable penis costume at the bar for my bartender. Do you think you could meet me there at like 630?
but I truly enjoy making out with my best friend more than my boyfriend
I have banged to "The Emperor's New Groove" way more than could possibly be reasonable.
Found out that I went to the same elementary school as the guy I'm hooking up with. Kosher or no
Randomize
