I guess what I'm trying to say is you've fucked more people than the economy.
If it makes you feel better he went down on me when i had a yeast infection.
It's like God knew that was my ex's best friend and punished me. I've never vomited that much in my life.
We're exchanging pot brownie recipes in my substance abuse class. This is going to be an awesome 7 weeks.
No its cool, because I bought a handle of tequila earlier, in case things went south
Try not to bring up the fact that I woke up and couldn't find my pants... He might get the wrong idea.
if this hangover is indicative of how 2011 is gonna be, i want nothing to do with it
Does anyone know who that girl who fell backwards and broke the shoe rack with her head was?
I'm doing lines by myself in the kitchen. I think your outside. yeah that's you. your naked.
Cuz its complicated and I hate complicated and I miss your penis
I ran into my boss at the liquor store on our lunch hour we both just stood there awkwardly until i was like your car bar or mine hahaha we both need a cab
Its funny that for once I get home and I'm just as high as my parents are.
with great strapon comes great responsibility.
my mom asked if I found my Easter basket. it's 1PM & I got home an hour ago from last night. if I'm looking for anything, it's my dignity.
I have like three friends I don't have sex with, what did you expect
Randomize
