hipster in red sally jessy raphael glasses inside. kick her.
Good thing you left when you did - ended up getting banned from jimmy johns.
idea:have a jello shot stand(opposed to lemonade stand) to raise money for spring break
the liquor store lady asked about three times if I was sure about buying two fifths of everclear. i told her I wanted to be on cops
You're such a slut.
I prefer opportunist.
Yes. Being a lesbian's wingman is a fun as it sounds
Everytime I walk into a bathroom at school that I've taken a pregnancy test in I get a little bit nostalgic....
Just realized the guy is in my class. Unless there's another guy that had half his ear bit off at a St. Patty's party
I asked if he wants to help me spring forward at 2am on Sunday. He seems down.
I don't remember anything that happened last night past 10.. I made him buy me a Buckeye's Donut tshirt. I have no idea why he'd want to fuck me after that.
If your mother gets up on the bar again, I will. The bouncer already had a talk with her earlier.
Ive fucked up. im like a feral dog rabidly chasing an infrequent dream amidst a cataclysm of disaster
He compared my blow job skills to finding gold treasure in a gold chest, so there's that.
I didn't want to shower, so I shaved my legs in the pool . That drunk .
He literally shouted this Viking war cry when he cam. Then as we laid there he sang me the most beautiful rendition of " When Irish Eyes are Smiling". I've never been more confused.
Randomize
