It's like a parade of train wrecks.
Can't remember why I called but it definitely had something to do with Lou Bega
If I had a clone, I'd fuck it with a condom
Say it nicely.
Fine. I want to lovingly bend you over and lovingly fuck the shit out of you. Happy?
throwing up turkey will be a nice break from throwing up ramen
he kept doing his monologue, "if a vagina could talk."
He is juggling broken glass botttles, I think its time to cut him off...
no. 1 rule of bromania: no females
I would take a bullet for Beyonce's baby
Is it bad if one of my goals right now is to snort blow through a licorice?
Don't answer that. It is bad.
All three of them were helicoptering their dicks to persuade me to take my thong off
it says 'tasty bitch' in sharpie on my tits...
Its not often you get to say, "The security guard at my job is my new drug dealer," but as of last night, I get to say it.
so much tequila, so little girl.
the guy working the counter at the liquor store noticed i got my haircut and said it was pretty.....
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