So how was he last night?
Five-minute foot-long.
Disadvantage of being gay..... my gag reflexes makes trying to make myself throw up extremely difficult.
my mom just asked me about sexting and if I have ever sent a naked picture to anyone. i fucking hate fox news.
I froze in his sixty one degree room but i came so hard. Like fucking the eskimo god.
You should've come out last night, I need someone to explain why the bartender tried to strangle me...
Yeah... I was considering changing that part but the boxed wine is non-negotiable.
Earned the respect of a group of freshman by chugging Das Boot while hanging out a window and lost it shortly after by wrecking a clown bike into them.
You have to wear the princess leia gold bikini every Sunday
I swear my vagina formed calluses just to deal with how big he is
I stirred my drink with a butcher knife. His roomate keeps giving me dirty looks
Like what do you want from me
I feel bad for her. If you sacrifice and have a chubby husband I feel that you assume he's not going to cheat on you....
He gave me an orgasim so fantastic that I had an asthma attack.
You wouldn't put pants on to see my parents.
The coast is clear - also, would it bother you if I chose not to wear pants?
Can I come kidnap you from work so we can chug mimosas? My little brother has a ski mask I can borrow.
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