Michael Bay diarrhea
NoDDING MY HEAD LIKE uyuEAH MOViUNG MY HiPS LioKe YEAhhhhhhhhhhh
wow.
i'm sorry, i thought "hey, she wants TO FUCK YOU" was a good enough cue
I mean its cheating, but i figure i've made out wiht married chicks before so its like a nicotine patch, quitting by doing less and less each day
Anything that comes outta your cooch is bound to be breathtaking
That could use a little rephrasing
Im still alive. Just can't talk. Or move. No need to worry
Just drove by where I lost my sausage gravy virginity
YOU MAKE ANAL SEX SOUND LIKE A SPORTING EVENT
I'm watching the Brazzers version of Mary Poppins and enjoying it. Volume on and all. 45 minutes.
I am about five seconds from ripping off my clothes and throwing myself into the ocean to become a mermaid
Pandora was on point with the sex music tonight
My arms in a cast, how am I supposed to have sex with only one hand?
more importantly I need two hands to eat pie
It feels appropriate that the wallet of my high school and college years would die at the hands of a spilled bong. Which in and of itself is a solid metaphor for those years.
I guess it's part of life. Sometimes your ex boyfriend becomes a drag queen.
Dude no i feel my liver disintegrating
Randomize
