a girl in my class is on a twilight fan site and running her fingers on the screen as edwards body comes up.
All I know is it had something to do with a plunger and tuna salad. I'm done. I'm quitting my job.
She got mad when I told her I'd bone her mom. She got MORE mad when her mom heard, and was flattered by it. Proud to say I attract MILFS.
Just got arrested at PF changs. Happy New year, China
Fucking him was like shopping for my first training bra.. Embarrassing yet extremely useful
There is a mosh pit in our kitchen. You better hurry.
we all took turns holding you up and pretending that you were simba and that we were presenting you to the jungle
This stranger told me I should "start playing for the other team" and then continued to talk to me about the joys of being a lesbian
A guy in a banana suit just got the whole bus to participate in a call and response version of Bohemian Rhapsody. HERO
Safe to say I'm terrified but totally AMPED
I'm missing my left shoe, and there's a note on my foot (in my handwriting) that says "HAHA BITCH" Any explanation for this?
Kick open the door, strike a pose, steal a boyfriend, end scene.
Alright I'd bang a 4 sober, It's been like 3-4 weeks or how ever long 4th of July was ago. I wanna fuck something.
4th of July was 12 days ago. The date is literally in the text you just sent.
I don't care about the dates I just wanna bone something.
Well, I turned down sex again. This is guy #5 in the past 2 weeks. My vagina is going to seek emancipation.
if I was a good friend this would be the time that i would remind you that you have a boyfriend
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