My new storm is the chrons
The only reason I needed a new one is bc I threw up on my other one(248): And since Verizon doesn't have a throw up test, I was eligible for a new one
It's finally official that I am from Oklahoma. I'm currently sleeping with my ex-fling's brother.
I don't care how ugly she is, I can't turn down a free movie +bj. In this economy that's downright irresponsible
I'm sitting in class drinking a forty out of a paper bag. No ones said anything yet. I think my professor is trying to ignore me. Better start yelling louder.
He said finals are more important than getting stoned on 4/20. I'm proud in a disappointing kinda way
If fate has that penis in my future.....I'm down.
Opened my wallet to find a slice of ham with a phone number written on it in sharpie.
Although last time you were unsure about someone they flipped a golf cart on me.
if i find out your the one who pierced my belly button im going to fuck your sister again
and PS, please don't fuck in the corn maze, k?
Btw I'm currently writing a paper in a beer garden. Be proud.
The walk of shame is a lot easier when I'm at a music festival and it's 12 feet from his tent to my tent
You are living the dream.
My boobs are numb because I've been using them as stress balls
i'm gonna crowd surf you onto his dick
Dentist appt at 2pm get milk poured on my tits by 2am
A marvelous 12 hours
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