This lady in my dui class just asked what patron was. I feel like she doesn't belong here
i just hugged the lady at the liquor store goodbye for the summer...
This could be one of the worst things i've done... The background of her phone is her and her boyfriend.
There's a hand-carved wooden bong in my backpack, and i really wish i could remember last night now.
They got their marriage license when they were at the courthouse for her arraignment.
Just bought a waterproof mattress cover. Bring it on sophomore year.
nah, they dropped the charges. apparently ripping his junk when he tried to hop the fence seemed like punishment enough...
...Just between you and me I just did Olympic grade ribbon dancing with toilet paper in the bar bathroom.
I don't remember anything that happened last night past 10.. I made him buy me a Buckeye's Donut tshirt. I have no idea why he'd want to fuck me after that.
DOWN HORMONES. BACK.
Just remember my house smells of thick cut bacon and I have a big dick.
Sorry about waking up naked in your bed this morning.
I just jerked off in front of my dog to make him jealous of my thumbs. There are consequences for stealing the last cheeto!
Apparently his version of saying "I'm Sorry" is streaking around our apartment building then asking for a blow job.....
Drunk. Send nudes. Just curious.
Randomize