He had some BAD nuttage
Nuttage?
It's like cleavage......... but different
we're ranked number 5 for having the most pot in the country for a university school. idk if i should feel worried or just plain blessed.
You need Jesus. Or a midol and a snickers. Whichever.
Just got a birthday card from Camel. How am I supposed to stop smoking when they care?
It took us hanging out like four times to kiss. Id like to fuck you before I'm 30
She showed up to the party with a live octopus and a 30 pack that was already half gone
Did you ask me to bring you a t-shirt to class or did I just dream that?
No, I did. It's a long story.
SORRY! Pervert came out for a bit. BAD PERVERT! BACK IN YOUR HOME!
I just had a flashback to the three of us in the bed and me shouting AM I THE BIGGEST OR LITTLEST SPOON?!
Do you still speak french? one of two girls I woke up with only speaks french...
strip vodka pong is never a good idea. I saw into his colon when he picked up the ball off the floor
I felt like the hulk waking up from a black out except with munchies
What color nail polish screams, "Either fuck me or get the hell out of my way"?
My mom is coming to visit today & it's giving me anxiety. I feel like she can see through me & into the whore I've become.
Woke up snuggling with a large wooden rhino that I stole last night...obviously, we had fun.
Randomize
