If I die tonight, wear a V neck to my funeral.
i make out with random ppl when i drink he shouldnt feel special
he was actually really polite. he asked before he came on my chest because he "wasn't sure my stance on it".
Having skype sex with him in the lounge at 1:45am...THIS IS WHAT HE DOES TO ME
I'm okay.. I had a good heart to heart with the cab driver Raheem - it's going to be our year.
He kept telling me how extraordinarily clean my ears were.
We just had to use a designated driver to get to night class.
we're almost there. Shes pounding on the car window telling the nurse whos on a smoke break to fuck off.
At least in the future when we're all real people we can laugh about the time we all had scabies together?
you haven't really lived until you are in a situation where your vagina is hanging out
Why do I think he'd like to keep my hair in a box?
You know you gave a quality blow job when you have to ice your neck and jaw the next day.
I already popped my bottle of Rose and took my boxers off. No can do muchacho
I puked on her cat, I think I should at least buy her breakfast
I'm glad you got documented proof of my stupidity with a head full of nitrous
Hahaha and I'm glad you are doing whip its at a childrens basketball game
Randomize
