I just want to know how you cleaned her puke off the twister mat with no gloves. And didn't throw up
i have a reoccuring irrational fear i'm going to walk in on my dad masterbating. Night.
is asking a girl out on a date while in another girls bed in poor taste?
That bus ride was like a tour of all the bushes I puked behind last night
just got dressed up for chatroulette- THAT desperate.
The douche that always wears spandex at the gym just walked into class with a dick going into his mouth drawn on his face. The professor said "rough night" and he still has no idea. Tyring to get a pic
get to allyx's house asap
Ok is everything ok
Yeah, theres just lesbians
omg yes on my way
Come help me clean. I know we won't be getting our security deposit back...but I would like to move out with our dignity.
She really is something else.
Words cannot describe what though. The best way to describe her is to say it like watching a bear and a whale have sex. You don't know why it's happening or how. But it's rather funny and you can't look away.
Well yeah. Plus. My dick looks awful. So I would need to do some extreme makeover dick edition before even starting something so ridiculous.
It's like everybody loves Raymond but the total opposite and everyone wants him to die
I haven't heard from him yet. He's either still asleep (which is entirely plausible..... There wasn't much sleeping happening last night) or he's robbing me blind. But I have renters insurance, so either way, I'm ok with it.
I need a hoe opinion
go on
I'm not fucking any of these fools. But if they want to buy me Olive Garden, that's their business.
Note to self: I can rip apart her vagina and she'll still cuddle with me, but if I steal her Chapstick she'll murder me !?
Randomize
