I need to shower the guilt off of my thighs.
Id pretty much put it in anything at this point. Jello. Dogs. 12 year old boys
Some dude at the gas station right now is buying a 30 rack of beast and a can of cat food. Happy Thanksgiving.
Reason #57 I am going to fail the bar... it's Tuesday and i'm drunk at Toy Story 3.
I need a second opinion on who's blood is in my car.
at last call she tried to get the bartender to fill her flask. when he refused, i had to stop her from trying to pour the rest of her beer in there.
Sorry I dragged you across a parking lot
just thought you should know it took me an hour and a half to make soup. I had to keep laying on my kitchen floor. being 21 is hard.
he sent me a pic of his dick and balls out with sunglasses over them like a face. i was at dinner.
do you still have it? i kinda want to see.
hes fine. but he did fall asleep while tebowing and started snoring
I don't know. What do people who don't get stoned do?
Our conversation concluded a weekly schedule of casual sex in between classes.
she crawled a good forty meters just to whisper in my ear... "dildon't"
I'm with jana at walgreens picking out penis rings.... Did you know they sell vibrators at walgreens? Wtf?
My dad just informed me that I may be entitled to $1700 worth of stimulus money... looks like that hitachi is coming sooner than later. Let's hope for the best!
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