She looks like an uncircumcised penis in a hat.
I'm going to skip that pointless convo with Mark, stick with the "we're talking" status, and bone barely legal, borderline gay, preppy guys on the DL.
i'm trying to figure out what goes best with beef ramen. a 2007 merlot or a 2008 pinot noir? i'm leaning toward the pinot noir.
You couldn't stand up so I took you home, took off your makeup, put you to bed then shaved off your eyebrows. I so nearly won the responsible adult prize.
Dude you took some guys glasses off his face and ran out of the bar
Remember when we had a keg, and then another 5 cases... and like 30 people drank it all?
Everything hurts.
All I saw was a purple blob and poking out from under was part of a green shirt. Took me a minute to realize it was him under that beast.Thought I should ask if he was actually breathing and conscience but then I saw him slowly exploring what few brave men have done before.
Wait. Wine + Crossbow..?
We decided this year instead of not participating in Halloween at all we are going to hand out free beers to the parents.
After I came she just held my balls until I fell asleep. It was like adult swaddling. Magical...
I only had ten dollars. So leave it to Katie to somehow makeout with the bartender, on his shift mind you, and get free drinks.
I am going to be so excited tomorrow when I find this box of crayons in my purse
& I just realized there is no vomit smiley. There needs to be a vomit smiley
After an orgasm, I always feel the urge to sing A Whole New World from the move Aladdin and I'm not quite sure why.
Hey, thanks for helping me this morning
Always a pleasure to feed you bread as your body lay crumpled on the floor.
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