it doesn't mae me god, the fact that I am god makes getting dressed futile and tedious... btw i am still drunk
i just got a Mexican deported. not sure how to feel.
You were face down, at your computer, surrounded by beer bottles listening a bagpipes version of amazing grace.
im naked on webcam to her boyfriend, but im playing neopets at the same time, so its all evened out
can't make this up: he's writing lyrics for the musical reenactment of how he met her @ an anime convention to perform at their wedding. yes, there'll also be dance routines involved.
youre just mad i got the high score on the breathalyzer
yea i really dont care about the sex, i just want him to eat my vag. He has to be good at because of his tremors.
Dnt forget 40 tuesday,dress nice! Like job interview nice, like funeral nice, like a couple muhfuckas sittin on their lawn drinkin forties on a tuesday nice!
I don't see what kind of idea someone could get from an envelope covered in jesus stickers and a note from a person and their dog. I'd say crazy person alert before flirting.
If I give you a key to my place you have to promise to one day wake me up with a blowjob.
And by one day I mean once every two weeks.
My middle name is suave and my vagina shoots rainbows, what else would you expect?
Seriously? A BAR is SPONSORING my 21... What did you do for your 21 again??
Why must everything this weekend have to do with something going into or coming out of my vagina?
Positive reinforcement! I'm training him for being a good boy and coming over. He gets sex and cookies.
after we fucked i left the room and when i came back he was patting his dick whispering "prouda you lil guy...prouda you"
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