i wouldnt be suprised if in indian your name meant "walking lie"
U know those big foam mats in the back gym for track?
ya, gonna go have sex there?
No I want one to have wings and pick me up and take me home
somehow we got the entire party to start singing "ill make a man out of you" from mulan. needless to say, that kid had the best keg stand i'd ever seen.
I saw someone get arrested while I was moving out...this has to be a good sign.
First day of class and I'm in a bar drinking pitcher #3. Foreshadowing?
Of course... Double fistin nati light cuz the powers out and it cuts down the times i gotta open the fridge... Genius
Some kid just stopped wherever he was walking, turned to me, and gave me a slow clap. So I'm pretty sure my walk of shame beats yours.
I'll check it out in the morning. Tonight has been reserved for getting baked and covering myself in kittens because THAT IS AN OPTION.
Just told my mom I need money for Molly. She was not happy
Well I walked the wrong way for a little bit and I don't remember if I fell asleep or not but I definitely laid down under the over pass for a while
You kept whispering to me that the guy making your burrito was an angel.
It was crazy man, at one point after already going 3 rounds I tried to breakaway for a smoke...she yanked me by the nipple hair back on top of her.
Broke my ankle and blacked out on my scooter last night. 'Twas grand.
It's such a sad loss when a hot guy finds Jesus and grows a neckbeard
Im so drunk and the cops showed up so i ran on all 4's through the woods because i had no shoes hoping they would mistake me for a fox
Randomize
