everytime i listen to a chris brown song and like it i feel like i bad person
Whatever my ex gf's roomates talked shit about me so I jizzed in their shampoo bottle one night
you rearended a car with your bike and then puked all over his back windshield. They made BUI's for you.
I'm going to start giving girls scratch off lottery tickets when they leave my place in the am. That way they have a chance of not regretting the night before
At the wedding. Seated next to the bar. No way this ends well
I just woke up to find the whole kitchen sick had been converted into a gravity bong.
He screamed for everyone to hide, unplugged the music, then talked to the cop. Last I saw he was high fiving him...
He's the fucking cop whisperer.
Ok I have to ask, whose idea was it to used crushed up norcos as margarita salt? And what did they say to convince everybody else to think it was a good idea?
I was fucking trucked by the swat team last night on State Street after UK won. But I got a picture with the guy afterwards so I forgive him
Youre attempt to ruin my night by putting Date Rape by Sublime on my sex playlist failed. She was into it.
On a scale of 1-10 how seriously are we considering being sugar babies?
I'm about a 7.95
I think I'm at a stage of my life where I subconsciously purposefully fuck everything up just to see if I can find a way out of it.
is that a dick in a sweater?
Hypothetically speaking of course, is it bad if a cat eats lube?
Lol, perhaps. But the drinks are so cheap, the music is better, and the bartenders and bouncers all know my name. I can't abandon it, even if it is a gay bar, its still my Nirvana.
Randomize
