roommate just walked in on us. two and a half times. the half, she just knocked, sighed, and walked away.
holy crap !! There is a MIDGET FAMILY in one of my rooms today !
How much trouble would you get into if you were to stomp down the hallway while loudly saying 'Fe Fi Fo Fum...'
So theres a slight possibility i may not graduate according to planned because i was out getting laid instead of studying. And im okay with that.
they're making a venn diagram comparing gummi bears against gummi worms...is this what i have to sit thru to get free weed????
I don't care what anyone says I want strippers at my funeral.
They both invited me to family dinner Sunday. Secretly dating two sisters just got real.
I mean nobody wants to admit they ate 9 cans of ravioli but i did and i am not ashamed of myself
hey, being drunk and dumb is my thing. Don't take that away from me.
IDK I WAS CAUGHT UP IN THE TEQUILA SHOTS AND FRIENDSHIP
It's not safe here. I had urgent and violent diarrhea last night, and I got blackout drunk. Please don't come over.
If you hear death cries, thats me singing. Just let me be.
Fucked him in a graveyard. Need plan b.
is it bad that I see hot guys I wanna sleep with as challenges instead of actual people?
yes. but it works for you
You know that pill i snorted last night? Yeh, its just hitting me now..... At work
uh why is my bathtub filled with kool aid? or is that blood?
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