We drank from noon till 5 am, there was adderall and nice jews involved it was just crazy
Its sad we have to plan out fun a month in advance. 30 sucks.
You dont remember anything at all? So you dont remember the shop down my road with the 'TO LET' sign over it? You were adamant that the 'I' had fallen off and that it used to say TOILET...so you took a shit right there in the doorway.
Dudes got a Polo tattoo. I don't care if he has a yacht I can't handle that level of gay.
I need a $60 an hour job, because I have a $50 an hour drinking habit.
And you just kept trying to fit through the dog door and not drop Jello shots.
When are you comin back?
probably mid next week, depending on when i finish my remaining half gallons
I think if I could use my boobs as a second pair of hands everything would be ok
I was mixing candy canes and coors light and was in a great place.
I don't even see the point of going over to his place dressed anymore.
I hope you fall on your chin.
Jealousy makes you ugly.
Dude, I puked in the stall for God knows how long. Halfway through, a kid sits down in the stall next to me and starts jacking off, i heard the porn on his phone and everything. so FYI, the middle stall is where good nights go to die
So last night took an interesting turn.. Never thought I'd say I had to pick up my glasses off the floor of a strip club
She broke up with me after I spent the whole day speaking in nothing but Marshawn Lynch quotes.
Think I was still drunk when I woke up cause I went and bought a mandolin
This is bullshit, I shit my pants for the 1st time in 30 years, stuck on the 405, fuck this shit.
Depends
Randomize
