do you remember how we all fit in that bathtub?
tequila
So drunk can't even tell it's my own house. WOaoOw.
Your two fuck buddies playing ping pong together. HOW. ADORABLE!
at the last minute we also decided to throw an egg in the beer bong. and he drank it, shell and all.
Dude I reek of $2.50 pitchers, $1 off/pack marlboro cigs, and fear.
Fear?
FEAR.
I was basically shocked at how calmly you accepted my violently shoving a french fry in your mouth.
...I can smell the alcohol on your breath through that text
You yelled "NICE PAJAMAS" at a construction worker wearing a reflective jumpsuit while we rode past on a bike taxi
Our sibling relationship has really blossomed into a wonderful mutual acceptance of sluttyness
So much Jack, so little girl.
I feel as though my head has drastically changed shape
I'll be honest, I too would punch the 21 year old version of myself in the face, and then have rough sex with him.
I don't care if his family has ties to the mafia, you go over there, ride his dick until it breaks off, put his dick back on, and keep on riding. Lather, rinse, repeat.
Thanks for the support, sis.
I'm sorry, but if I hear stories of you getting fingered in the ass, and selling weed, you are not coming to my party.
Best night if my life? Time I got eaten out in the backseat of a M5 while eating White Castle. Then he fucked me. Perfect
Randomize
