butt sex is not good for yourself don't do it
Thanks?
wtf he couldnt undo my bra, i asked him if it was his first time and he said "with a girl? yeah"
what made you think it was a good idea to trust the girl that hides tequila in her backpack?
didn't have any spoons so I beer bonged my chicken noodle soup. I fucking love camping.
we went to the store to buy cookie dough and conditionally went straight towards the booze
I wonder if he just picks random boners to send or just the realy impressive ones
I don't know why I've never thought to take my bong into the bathtub before.
there's another hole in my ceiling...someone fell through the attic this time....
You'd be amazed at how difficult it is to find pics of the helicopter dick
I am very proud of your internet skills
Like not in a "I wanna have sex with you way" more like a "I wanna cuddle your mustache way"
Sometimes I get in situations where I realize they think I'm smarter than I am and then it's just one more thing I have to fake.
I'm about to be a big disappointment.
And amler is totally snoring loud as fuck sitting on the steps with her feet in a puddle of soda puke
This is possibly the most humiliating moment of my life. I have diarrhea, in a port-a-potty, at the Renaissance Festival.
I love FaceTime, every time you ring me the morning after its like I went home with your one night stand too.
Honestly his girlfriend says she hates me cause she thinks im trying to get him to cheat on her with me...she should hate me cause i already accomplished that.
Randomize
