I think tonya harding is in my dwi class!
Ask her how she and Jeff Gillooly split the cats after the divorce.
If it wasnt for meatballs I would have fucking killed myself already.
We are not on the "bring me breakfast" level. He's bringing me penis if I ask for breakfast too I'll just sound greedy
When we were grinding I think your nuva ring fell into my shoe
He said he wanted to go to France " just to piss in the nice areas". I want to fuck him.
It's times like this I miss having my nipples pinched
I am one Jewel song away from suicide watch
There is a pile of hair outside the apartment next door. At least now I know what all that shouting was about last night.
We got buck wild in our animal onesies last night. You kept ripping off your tail in angry rages.
FINE YOU CAN EAT HOT WINGS WHILE WE HAVE SEX
Just text him and be like do you want this pussy or not. You have three seconds to respond.
Just because I also want a blowjob doesn't mean I don't want to just see you too.
It's not a hangover, it's "slept on a couch with another person and said person moves a lot and is loud"
Your sister just admitted to being a " much bigger bitch" than you. So you've got that going for you, which is nice.
Be there in a sec. We have to stop at Target to buy her underwear first.
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