You know you want to come over later
1:27a: Um no
1:45a: Maybe
2:05a: Probably
2:38a: I'm outside, let me in
i'm sleeping with myself tonight because i remember my name and i won't regret it in the morning. sorry.
So he saw that playlist i made with his name as the title. i think he's creeped out that I have 106 songs that remind me of him
She gave me a bj in her parent's kitchen while I ate the rest of her mom's birthday cake. Fuck. Yes.
THERE ARE SO MANY GREAT DICKS IN THE WORLD. HOW DID I NOT DISCOVER THIS SOONER!?
He was just laying on the stairs and then screamed, "Is that a clubhouse?" I haven't seen him since
Is that you who's passed out on my treadmill?
No one understands that once a girl pours a handle of smirnoff all over herself, clearly she is wasted
Dude, had to, it's Canada Day, I fucked her for Canada. Seriously, I put my Canadian flag on my bed and fucked her on it.
He looked at my vag and said "you have a nice situation down there. Good work"
it's ok. he made up for it by standing there and holding my purse while i made out with three guys at the bar. it was a pretty good night.
I just sent you a google doc listing all the reasons why I should stop hooking up with him. Feel free to add to it.
However today I got my lube that might I add was dripping out of the box. I'd like to think my mailman was mixing business with pleasure.
She didn't get a tit job, she's just wearing the right size bra for once
Idk maybe I'll talk to him once he gets out of jail just to yell at him and get my strawberry ice cream back.
Randomize
