Is it 'vaginas' or 'vaginae?'. Either way there were a shit ton of them.
i really need to stop putting makeup on my cats..
Well, let's be honest here. You're dealing with gay guys... EVERYTHING has an emotional attachment.
I wish I could go back in time 3 years and tell my freshman self how easy it is to hook up with freshmen
You ever get that 6th sense feeling in your dick like you know its gonna get sucked later?
He's cheating on her.
Are you sure it wasn't her?
I have my glasses on, and as long as she didn't change her face in the past two months; its her.
Two hot shots of tequila for breakfast? Yeah today is gonna be a shit show
Wait. Did you let me snort wine last night cause I wanted to smell jesus's blood?
Yes. I have pictures. Your soul is mine.
I drew a nude short fat middle aged woman today and liked it
It was honestly one of my favorite days in art class except for the 20 min she faced me and kept looking at me and we made eye contact
I'm going home because your Crackraptor step-brother tried getting his nasty meat hawks in my pants last night.
I just had to remind myself that I'm visible in real life. Sitting in the car in a parking lot, and almost took my shirt off because the tag is itchy and I wanted it off... and you know I don't wear bras...
he puked all over my guest bed and the said he felt good enough to clean it up. he poured bleach all over the bed and passed out in it. he had the chemiacal burn for a month...
My cast smells like cheese steak rolls
If I was banging all the guys that people think I am, I'd quit buying batteries.
On a scale of one to 10 how Risky is it to sleep with a married man (all morals set aside)
Randomize
