At what point in time did you decide the pot head with Taco Bell was more important than all your friends.
At about the same time you guys weren't burritos.
is it bad that i have made the decision to never travel to vienna simply because of that transvestite that won the bachelor?
dont start drinking without me
the pharmacist hit on me as i picked up my herpes medecine. i think we found a winner.
No i dont need Magnum Condoms, that would be like putting MC Hammer pants on my dick
I really wanna punch him. Right in his cell-phone-sized penis
You should get with him and swear you have to use lambskin condoms. That'll test his veganism.
she looks like she scalped a horse for her weave
She sucked my dick while i watched james bond. And they say marriage sucks
His beard is glorious and he smells like barbecue. Introduce me to him.
2 girls slept in my bed with me. 3 more girls slept on a mattress on my floor. The furthest I got was cuddling. Here's my man card.
I've officially dedicated my newly single life to making myself squirt.
I have never encountered a chode in the wild
It is such a beautiful day to not be arrested
We had a company shotgunning beers contest in the parking lot today, and I won. God bless America!
You’re sleeping on my couch so you’re not making dick appointments tonight
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