I dont like him- his parents were home and he hid me in his closet like anne frank
omg, I know. It's so embarrassing that we've both had his penis in parts of our bodies
Hey a mouth doesn't really count. A vagina counts more.
dude thats like the second time shes peed on the couch at a party. we cant invite her anymore
so the girl i've been sleeping with for 3 weeks now just figured out that i don't know her name
The cop was more concerned with the fact I had cowboy boots on with shorts than the fact we were under age
We need to re-create the Get Some Ass Tour 2002.
Um, 2 out of 3 people involved with that particular event are now married, so I don't think that will be happening.
HELLO, they're MARRIED! They need to get some ass more than anyone.
Vegas is great, yelled at a guy 4 lanes over if he wanted a bj. ended up having sex in a vacant lot. I think he was homeless.
It was everywhere. My dick was a sprinkler of lost future children.
His dad gives me dirty looks whenever I come over though. I think it's because I eat his food and have sex with his son.
He kept singing Happy Birthday to himself, yelling at the bouncers for not letting him in, and telling them his "father will hear of this." He was like a drunken Scottish Draco Malfoy.
Watching a bear prancing around in a tiara is worth a loss of bar time.
conclusion: canadians have really freaky sex
I didn't really understand how big 10 inches is. Now I know.
Wine through a straw in a subway cup.....classy
Want ramen today?
I need a salad
SALAD DOESNT WARM YOUR HEART AND BELLY
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