No one goes out in public like that, unless they do anal
He said he had a gf but the monogamy was "only implied".
That reminds me...we need to get swords
Just made gatorade. in the bathtub.
Next time I say "Watch this" Get me the fuck out of the bar.
..She then engaged in what she called an "interpretive pole dance"
He just referred to his foreskin as a snuggie. Help.
Just did a walk of shame dressed as a cowgirl and walked past his ex's entire sorority. Yippee kye aye, motherfucker.
I have had more skin than food in my mouth the last three days
You need to fuck him. The man has his own Wikipedia.
HE'S EATING THE CONFETTI. STOP HIM NOW.
I'M ALSO PLAYING VIDEO GAMES AND THINKING ABOUT ORDERING A PJIZZA. I'M NOT SURE WHAT MY MUSTACHE WANTS.
After the 3rd time his brother walked in on us I asked "Does he ever knock?" his reply "This is his room"... Turns out he didn't even live there... I feel like a hoe.
i dont get why youre mad at me. i promised you he looked like jim morrison and you failed to ask me like which era
In hindsight following that black guy in the ghostbusters costume was a terrible decision on everyone's part
Randomize
