i puked out the bus window last night on the way home. i remember it, but i don't remember everyone else screaming to put their windows up.
She has HUUUUUUUGE nipples
So I said to her: one time i broke my dick and when they took off the cast i could cum across a baseball field
I've been emailing with a woman. I don't think she's into me, but we've become sorta email buddies. I'm hoping to meet her because on her profile she states she's into 'fisting.' Frankly the thought kinda freaks me out but I'm dying to see what kind of woman is 1) into that and 2) admits it upfront.
I bet her clit looks like pig in a blanket.
he had two deer mounted on his dorm room wall with panties and bras hanging from the antlers... i cant believe i contributed to bambi's headgear...
I think you're going to have to drive me to white haven. I don't know if my brain can handle having my mom drop me off at a strip club.
Still losing my voice, so I am trying to get it back through drugs. Welcome to my Monday logic.
Dude imagine how many pictures of dicks Obama gets. That can't be unusual. Almost every kids in the US has written the president a letter.
I can't even express how horny I am. The English language isn't equipped for what I'm plotting.
I couldn't finish the episode and had to lay down because the snapple commercial with the mustache was blowing my mind
We're over by the bouncy castles. I'm the one wearing a baby. Bring Twizzlers.
We were on a plane, I couldn't just grab his dick
I bought the restaurant a boat airhorn to wake up sleeping employees.
I love you
He told me was "pretty like the wife in some movie where the husband is a cheater." I think I'm gonna fuck him.
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