drank two beers while on the toilet at home during lunch break. new high or new low, not sure
no, there's no challenge. I live a humble lifestyle out of virtue.
You wear Armani Exchange.
I need a creepy friend to scare off the other creepy people
I would be honored to be that friend.
i'm pretty sure the only people calling it "sexting" are ones who don't actually do it
all i remeber is falling off a fence and banging him in the middle of the street, not sure which one gave me this cut
If a young child walked up to you and grabbed your penis, you'd feel violated too.
I woke up this morning peeing out bubbles . I smell like baby wash . What the hell happened .
Something's wrong. Everything's on fire. Unless it was like that before. Then everything's alright.
Just got caught staring at a woman breast feeding. My only response was, "She's so adorable".
He almost got to me tonight but then I was like fuck it I'm going to dance with a teli-tubby on the bar so fuck you
I kinda feel like I was hit by a Prius. Just glad it's not bus status.
I mean I'm screaming I love the gays in the middle of Bart so yeah
They think its so cute and admirable that I learned French. BITCH HAVE YOU NEVER HEARD OF GOOGLE TRANSLATE? sexting foreign bitches, there's an app for that
Oh my god, it's like someone broke the off button in my butthole
Just showered and cleaned every bit of sex off of me cuz i have a feelin my stepmom has jesus powers and would be able to smell it on me
Randomize
