chicago's viagra triangle is not unlike the bermuda triangle in thatt things just get lost...... planes, ships, dignity, virginity, etc.
The words "my birth control fell out" should never be spoken
She said that I needed to "pregame her so it can slip right in."
I found the perfect eye liner, it passed the blow job test, no smudging!!
so the photographer said "let's get a picture of the cousins" so we posed together, and then he said " lets get a picture of the couples" So we posed together.
Clearly my hormones are sending beaming lights to every penis in the area
She just tricked me into telling her the balance of my 401k... She's like a gold digging jedi mind trick ninja
No talking tonight. Just drinking and puking up memories
My jeans are ripped and her glitter was all over me.. My walk of shame looked like I fucked a unicorn last night
Do you think kicking my coke habit is a good personal goal to put down on the evaluation form?
Me and tommy were trying to figure out why our printer was jammed, found a condom stuck in the paper slot. #collegeprobs
I truly wish I could say I pulled my groin straddling our cab driver but unfortunately I cannot
He is currently passed out on his toilet. Point day drinking.
It's like if you wanna bond just do a ropes course or have group sex you don't have to be weird about it
I just bought a slurpee and condoms. God bless America.
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