Seriously, I'd take them all over any of the milfs here...and you know how much that means coming from me
Is it sanitary to roast marshmallows over a cigarette lighter?
that coffee was exactly what I needed. Also whose awesome hat is on the couch with ear flaps? I wanna put my head in it
That bad?
Full length cargo pants, running shoes, and a partial unibrow. Alcohol really is blinding.
Do you remember that blonde girl he brought home from the bar on Friday night? She didn't leave until Monday afternoon. We didn't even know she was still in his room...what a sketchy weekend.
I'm in the bar bathroom about to pass out. But it's ok cause I set my alarm to go off for last call.
I think the pivotal moment was when we used the see and say as a drinking game with shots of whiskey. It was all downhill after that.
You just said we could build a blanket and pillow "fuck fort." Of course I'm never leaving you.
It was your ex but it was not eighties night, it was pudding wrestling. And either thank you or I'm sorry depending on the state of my pants left on the doorstep
Summary of my night: made out with a complete stranger at a club dressed in the Geico gecko costume...
It's a sad statement on my day when the high point was getting a pap test.
Your mom has reinvented the use of a ping pong ball.
Idk what's worse.... Yesterday not waking up in my bed or today waking up in the hello kitty gown.
They were shocked that I could handle my liquor so well. I'm half Irish and half Russian. This is what I'm made for
I need to get laid. Right now that freshman frat pledge & my Econ professor are the leading candidates
That’s quite a spread
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