a strip club that doesn't allow touching or asking for sex... whats the point?
unless her vagina can tell me my horoscope in sign language, I'm not going.
We're gonna have to suck it up and start making out for free drinks. No homo. I'm watching Tyra "I kissed a girl and I got free drinks."
Let's do it. All homo
New first...just saw an entire family of homeless hitch hikers...kids and all. God, i love Oklahoma!
so my car got towed last night. I didnt know it cost 118 dollars to have a college experience
you told me to make out with him to promote the social success of the sorority
after watching ten minutes of "the decision," I conclude that King Lebron has more influence on America than Barak Obama. I love our countries values.
Valuable lesson learned: if you reach the point where you have to talk yourself in to finishing the last half of your beer, you shouldn't try.
I left the guinea pigs on the dryer. Make sure to take care of them.
I felt like... 50% confused and 50% like a slow roasted flip flop.
I thanked him for the booty call offer but told him I'd rather just do it myself
How's moving going?
Uh, we're on the way to the store to buy more booze
As a BFF it is your duty to answer when I drunk call you at 3 in the morning because I couldn't find a knife to cut that cake. I finally found one, fell asleep with it and the cake in bed. K thanks bye.
Want to come over and dangle your tits on top of me like a skewer?
We did blind alcohol taste testing and she got 10 of 10. I'm in love.
Help. Why am I so naked?
Randomize
