I like the name aiden. he likes stella. I told him they're coming out of my vagina, and I will name them what I damn well please. Stella goes.
Steve is enlightening me on how and why u put gerbils up your ass
You just kept yelling "SATAN!" at me every time I walked by
you know that annoying kid in my psych class? accidentally hit him in the face with a door today. perfect end to the semester.
I lost count after the 4th body shot but I think I'm wearing at least 3 different peoples clothes.
His rebound girl is half his size, looks like a leprechaun, is majoring in theater studies and has arms like Rosie O'donnell. Do I win?
Why have her stay eight hours when I only last eight minutes?
You had your dick do your apologizing for you last night. Apology accepted.
Walking in on a gay threesome, with a girl in the corner watching and taking vid is a reason to not only knock, but to never go to Savannah.
Some toppless girl just walked past me in the hall and gave me half a carton of smokes. I have never been more aroused.
you take my contact solution?
drank it last night then filled it with brandy for the plane ride.
No more chicken and waffles served by drag queens at 2 AM. :(
I wore a shirt that says "more tequila" to my bday party last year and that's why I want to be my own friend
I sent him a topless photo and he complimented my eyes. I'm not sure if I'm offended or pleasantly surprised.
Please tell me that nice older woman you're with at the bar is not your comp&lit professor.
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